So...this isn't going to be related to anything I've been writing...I just feel like sharing some thoughts I've had lately.
So, in only a couple weeks, I'm going to be moving to Idaho to start school at Brigham Young University-Idaho. I'm so excited! I'm counting down the days when I can finally start my life and get out of the limbo I've been in since May.
But lately it's been on my mind how I feel like I've forgotten who made it possible for me to go to school and have the opportunities I have; my Heavenly Father.
Since I graduated in May, and even a few weeks before, I just wasn't really feeling it as much. The gospel I mean; which sounds horrible. I stopped reading my scriptures because I wanted to read and grow from them, and started just getting it done for seminary. I wasn't praying very sincerely anymore, and going to church was getting tiresome.
All through the summer and the last few months, I've known I need to do better. I've stressed myself out so bad because I feel like God isn't happy with me, because He knows I can be doing better too. But at the same time, I still can't get myself to really try harder.
Something I've been thinking about is how grateful I am for the Atonement of Jesus Christ. And also how grateful I am for a God who will listen to me, because he loves me.
I'm so grateful for the power of prayer, and the personal relationship I can have with my Father in Heaven.
And I want to testify that those two things: Prayer and the Atonement are true, and they're real. No one is perfect. And whenever you feel like you've let yourself and God down, just remember that it can always be fixed. You can pray to God, and ask for His help. You don't have to be perfect right away, and you won't be. But you can work with Heavenly Father everyday, and get a little bit better everyday. The most important thing is just to be honest with him in sincere prayer. Tell him how tired you are about going to church. Tell him how much you hate reading the scriptures because their boring, or you don't think your getting anything out of them anymore. Tell him everything your feeling and thinking; and then listen.
I'm so grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ in my life. I know it's true. I know we have a loving, patient, and a great listening Father in Heaven. He loves me and He loves you. I know that without Him, I would not be going to the school that I feel I need to be going to personally. And with Him, I know that I'll have the experiences and the strength that I need to have in my life. I testify all these things in the name of our Savior Jesus Christ, amen. :)