Infectious Diseases: What Price Will We Pay?

Abstract

            This paper discusses the controversy surrounding vaccinations, and gives a brief history about immunizations and the impact they’ve had in preventing infectious disease. This discussion includes three different topics surrounding this issue: The link between vaccines and autism, the difference between natural immunity and artificial immunity, and the importance of medical ethics. My own argument will also be included based on the information I’ve acquired through my research.

 The Reason behind Vaccines

An argued topic in the world today is that of vaccinations, and the role of individual rights when it comes to be immunized. Many believe vaccines are saving us from the devastating impacts of disease and should be required, while others refuse, and argue they’re harmful and a matter of personal opinion. Questions are being asked, such as: are they really preventing diseases?  Or, exactly how dangerous are they? Perhaps taking a look back in history can give us a grasp of how far vaccinations have brought us.

Back in the 1950s, polio was widely feared and was seen as the worst threat to the public. It produced more than 300,000 cases, resulting in 58,000 deaths each year (Opposing Viewpoints, 2015). “Diseases like whooping cough, polio, measles, Haemophilus influenzae, (HIBS) and rubella struck hundreds of thousands of infants, children and adults in the U.S. (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention [CDC], 2014).

Vaccinations are used to avoid and hopefully eradicate many of these infectious diseases that have spread throughout the world and taken the lives of thousands of people. From the CDC’s definition, vaccines contain the same virus they’re trying to prevent, but the difference is that these viruses are weakened to the point that they will not cause the full-blown illness. However, they are still strong enough to cause an immune response against the disease. Because of this, “a vaccine is a safer substitute for a child’s first exposure to a disease” (CDC, 2014).

This method was started by Edward Jenner, a physician and scientist, who created the first vaccine for smallpox by using cowpox (a similar disease that affects cows) in 1796. (Vaccines Pros and Cons, 2015). Because of vaccine developments, diseases like Diphtheria, Rubella, Polio, and more “are becoming rare . . . because we have been vaccinating against them” (CDC, 2014). However, by choosing not to vaccinate, we’re again putting ourselves at risk for an outbreak.           

For example, In Japan in 1974, about 80% of children were getting the vaccine for pertussis, or whooping cough. Only 393 cases were reported that year, and there were no pertussis related deaths. Over the next few years, the vaccination rates began to drop, until only about 10% were being vaccinated. By the year 1979, more than 31,000 people had contracted whooping cough and 41 deaths were reported (CDC, 2014).

Great Britain, had a similar problem when fear of the pertussis vaccination led people to avoid immunizations. The affects were “dramatic and immediate” with more than 100,000 cases and 36 deaths. From these situations “it seems clear . . . if we were to stop vaccinating, [these diseases] would come back” (Opposing Viewpoints, 2015).

Understanding the reasoning behind those that refuse vaccines can help us come to a conclusion of whether or not we should mandate them, and also help us find a way to avoid future outbreaks. In this essay, I will discuss three important points made by those opposed to vaccines, and address the opposite views as well before concluding with my own thoughts.

The Issue of Autism

It has become increasingly common for people to refuse vaccinations because of their potential risks. The first example involves Andrew Wakefield, a former physician in the United Kingdom. Wakefield claimed that MMR Vaccines were not tested adequately for safety, and consequently cause Autism. He argues that single vaccinations for Measles, Mumps, and Rubella are safer than the grouped MMR vaccine. After being published in a popular magazine titled The Lancet, the British Medical Council disqualified him from practicing medicine when no evidence could be found to support his claim. It was also discovered that he “altered the medical histories of all 12 of his patients,” making him guilty of scientific fraud. The remaining stories floating throughout the media have continued to damage public health. (CNN, 2011). Many still advocate that the MMR vaccination is linked to Autism, and argue parents should be allowed to choose the separate vaccinations they wish for their children (Wakefield, 2014,).

Autism is one main concern to parents above all else, and though autism isn’t completely understood, it is known that “Autism is not a disease, but a syndrome with multiple non – genetic and genetic causes” (Muhle, Trentacoste, Rapin, 2004). One non – genetic cause it’s referring to is being exposed to toxic substances that can be found in vaccines (Muhle, Trentacoste, Rapin, 2004).

In 1999, it was recommended that that “thimerosal [an organic mercury compound] be removed from vaccines.” Though the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and the US Public Health Service (PHS) never stated there was any evidence of harm caused by the ingredient. They also emphasize “that the large risks of not vaccinating children far outweigh the unknown and probably much smaller risk, if any, of cumulative exposure to thimerosal-containing vaccines over the first 6 months of life” (ProCon, 2015).

A second case of autism and vaccines involved a twenty-month old toddler who, after receiving five vaccinations, stopped making eye contact, lost her ability to speak, and withdrew socially. Within a few months, she was diagnosed with autism. In court seven years later, they ruled that her autism had been caused by her vaccines.

Many parents were relieved to hear the government had finally acknowledged the link between autism and vaccinations. But the court’s ruling was misunderstood, and the “Clinical Immunization Safety Assessment (CISA) . . .  within the CDC . . .  pointed out that officials had decided Hannah’s underlying mitochondrial dysfunction was aggravated by her vaccines, leading to fever and an ‘immune stimulation that exceeded metabolic reserves’” (Opposing View Points, 2015). In other words, it was an underlying genetic disorder that already existed before the vaccines were given.

Though it is true the vaccinations aggravated the pre-exiting disorder, it is still arguably more important for these children to be vaccinated, “because a vaccine is less taxing on the immune system than a full-blown illness”(Opposing View Points, 2015).

In the end, there is no scientific evidence that claims vaccines cause autism, but many still doubt. David Tayloe, a pediatrician and president-elect of the American Academy of Pediatrics, says “[Autism is] a terrible condition. It upsets families, and it upsets me. But all the fear and anger about vaccines is misplaced . . . there's just nothing there" (qtd. Downs, 2008). 

Natural vs. Artificial Immunity

            Others argue that natural exposure to a disease is more beneficial than receiving an artificial injection. There are even pro-vaccine organizations that explain the effectiveness of natural immunity by claiming that “natural infection . . . causes better immunity than vaccines.” And rather than needing several doses from a vaccine, natural immunity can easily occur after only one exposure (Is Natural Infection Better than Immunization?, 2013).

It’s also argued that vaccines put dangerous substances into your body, such as formaldehyde and aluminum, in addition to the virus itself. Kurt Perkins, a Chiropractor and wellness expert notes, “This process would never occur in building natural immunity” (Vaccination vs. Immunization, 2013).

Though I agree natural immunity is more effective to prevent us from disease after the first exposure, I do not agree that it’s the safest way to gain immunity. As stated before, these diseases have caused many deaths throughout history before their vaccinations had been created; these illnesses are not the common cold or a sore throat.

In a book written by the US Department of Health and Human Services titled Understanding Vaccines What They Are and How They Work, it’s stated that “with naturally acquired immunity, you suffer the symptoms of the disease. . . . Which can be quite serious or even deadly” (Understanding Vaccines, 2008, p. 4). For example, HIBS, a bacterial infection that that is usually seen in young children, “can lead to a potentially deadly brain infection” and can also cause diseases like “meningitis (inflammation of the coverings of the brain and spinal column), bloodstream infections, pneumonia, arthritis and infections of other parts of the body” (New York State Department of Health, 2014). Also, you carry the risk of passing the disease on to someone else. (Understanding Vaccines, 2008, p. 4).

            Because of vaccinations, gaining immunity to disease is less risky and easier to achieve without the risk of coming in contact with the full-disease. Vaccines also “prevent a disease from occurring in the first place, rather than attempt[ing] a cure after the fact. It is much cheaper to prevent a disease than to treat it” (Understanding Vaccines, 208, p. 4).

Medical Ethics

            The last topic discussed is medical ethics. By mandating vaccinations, the private decisions made between patients and doctors is compromised. This violates the “very clear language in the Informed Consent section of the AMA Code of Medical Ethics” (Adams, 2015).

            The AMA Code also states that physicians must honor the decisions of their patients, and patients possess the “right of self-decision.” Mike Adams, an editor of Natural News, and activist in many different aspects of health argues: “every medical intervention comes with some level of risk, even if that risk is small. [But] it is not zero, as is routinely and repeatedly claimed by vaccine fanatics” (Adams, 2015). The problem Adams is addressing, is that most patients are never told about the risks involved in vaccinations, which interferes with their right to make the informed choice.

My concern with medical ethics, is how unaware people are of the risks and the benefits of vaccinations. From my research I believe many hear the controversial debates of the dangers of vaccinations, and neglect to take the time to do any research themselves. I agree with Adams, and the AMA Code of Ethics, that "Physicians should sensitively and respectfully disclose all relevant medical information to patients" (Adams, 2015). If people remain un-educated we will be put at greater risk. It’s disconcerting to imagine that suffering another Polio pandemic could possibly be the only way to remind people of the enormous benefits of vaccines. What I’m arguing, is that something needs to be done to lessen the ambiguity surrounding vaccines to avoid these diseases from bouncing back again.

To give one more example, I found a study which included parents who had vaccinated their children, and parents that had not. From the study, 51% of those who refused vaccines believed that the severity of these diseases was low, while only 18% of those who had chosen vaccines agreed with them. From this research, we see that most who choose to unvaccinate their children, are dramatically unaware of the diseases and the impact they have on individuals and societies (Omer et al., 2009).

            After spending the time I did on this research, I strongly believe vaccinations need to be carried out by individuals to avoid the risks to themselves, and the rest of society. I stand behind the CDC when they caution: “if we let ourselves become vulnerable by not vaccinating, a case that could touch off an outbreak of some disease that is currently under control is just a plane ride away” (2014). I agree that “Vaccines are held to the highest standard of safety” (CDC, 2011). And I also agree that the risks of vaccinations are “extremely small and less than that of the risk of serious complications from the disease itself” (Wilson, 2001).

            We live in a time now, where most of these diseases occur so rarely, it’s impossible to know for ourselves how devastating they are. Unlike those affected by Polio, we don’t see our friends and family members dying left and right. This is concerning, because it gives people a false sense of security. These diseases still exist, and if we choosing not to vaccinate “we could soon find ourselves battling epidemics of diseases we thought we had conquered decades ago” (CDC, 2014).

             I argue that doctor’s need to disclose all information about vaccines to patients so they can exercise their own right to choose. To be clear, I will use these words from an article in the New England Journal of Medicine which says:

            The committee . . . recommends that clinicians address vaccine refusal by respectfully listening to parental concerns, explaining the risk of non-immunization, and discussing the specific vaccines that are of most concern to parents. . . Continued refusal after adequate discussion should be respected unless the child is put at significant risk of serious harm (e.g., as might be the case during an epidemic)’ (Omer et al., 2009).

            As parents are given the chance to openly discuss their concerns, and know the facts surrounding vaccines, I believe they still have the right to choose not to vaccinate. But they need to be made clear about what risks are involved by remaining unprotected. They need to understand how their choice will affect those around them in the event they contract one of these preventable diseases and risk passing it onto another unvaccinated individual, or to a child who is not yet old enough to receive their own vaccinations.

            I conclude that vaccines have greatly impacted the health of the public, and they need to be carried out by all individuals that are medically able. I argue, that even though vaccines and their risks are not completely understood, the risks of choosing not to vaccinate are far greater than if we keep ourselves protected from these devastating diseases. In the end, vaccinations are the best way to keep our society safe, and it’s time we make sure others understand the importance of vaccinating themselves and their children.  

References

Adams, M. (10 Feb, 2015). American Medical Association opposes mandatory vaccines: medical ethics statement. Retrieved from http://www.naturalnews.com/048571_mandatory_vaccines_code_of_ethics_American_Medical_Association.html

CNN News. (2011). Retracted autism study an 'elaborate fraud,' British journal finds. Retrieved from http://www.cnn.com/2011/HEALTH/01/05/autism.vaccines/

Downs, M. (2008). Autism-Vaccine Link: Evidence Doesn’t Dispel Doubts. Retrieved from http://www.webmd.com/brain/autism/searching-for-answers/vaccines-autism

Muhle, R., Trentacoste S. V., Rapin, I. (May 2004). The Genetics of Autism. Proquest, 113.5, 472-86. Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com.byui.idm.oclc.org/docview/228398186/6316052593C547C9PQ/2?accountid=9817

New York State Department of Health. (2014). Haemophilus Influenzae Type B (Hib, Haemophilus b). Retrieved from https://www.health.ny.gov/diseases/communicable/haemophilus_influenzae/fact_sheet.htm

Omer, S. B., Salmon, D. A., Orenstein, W. A., deHart, P., Halsey, N. (May 7, 2009). Vaccine Refusal, Mandatory Immunizations, and the Risks of Vaccine-Preventable Diseases. Retrieved from http://media.mycme.com/documents/34/omer_2009_8396.pdf

Perkins, K. (2013, June 12). Why I Will Never Choose to Vaccinate my Own Son and Any Future Kids my Wife and I Have. Health Impact News. Retrieved from http://healthimpactnews.com/2013/dr-kurt-why-i-will-never-choose-to-vaccinate-my-own-son-and-any-future-kids-my-wife-and-i-have/

ProCon.org. (2015). Should Any Vaccines Be Required for Children? Retrieved from http://vaccines.procon.org/

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2001). Frequently Asked Questions About Vaccine Safety. Retrieved from http://www.cdc.gov/vaccinesafety/Vaccines/Common_questions.html

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2014). What Would Happen if We Stopped Vaccinations? Retrieved from http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/vac-gen/whatifstop.htm

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2014). Why Are Childhood Vaccines so Important? Retrieved from http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/vac-gen/howvpd.htm

The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. (2013). Vaccine Education Center. Retrieved from http://vec.chop.edu/service/vaccine-education-center/vaccine-safety/general-safety-concerns.html

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (January 2008). Understanding Vaccines What They Are How They Work. Retrieved from http://www.niaid.nih.gov/topics/vaccines/documents/undvacc.pdf

Vaccines. (2015). In Opposing Viewpoints Online Collection. Detroit: Gale. Retrieved from http://ic.galegroup.com/ic/ovic/ReferenceDetailsPage/ReferenceDetailsWindow?failOverType=&query=&windowstate=normal&contentModules=&display-query=&mode=view&displayGroupName=Reference&limiter=&currPage=&disableHighlighting=true&displayGroups=&sortBy=&search_within_results=&p=OVIC&action=e&catId=00000000LVZI&activityType=&scanId=&documentId=GALE%7CPC3010999291&source=Bookmark&u=byuidaho&jsid=42e9c067b396f46b3555f782159c23a0

Wakefield, A. (2014). The Link Between the MMR Vaccine and Autism Is Real. In C. F. Naff (Ed.), At Issue. Why Is Autism on the Rise? Farmington Hills, MI: Greenhaven Press. (Reprinted from Transcript: Statement from Andrew Wakefield, Age of Autism, 2013) Retrieved from http://ic.galegroup.com/ic/ovic/ViewpointsDetailsPage/ViewpointsDetailsWindow?failOverType=&query=&prodId=OVIC&windowstate=normal&contentModules=&display-query=&mode=view&displayGroupName=Viewpoints&limiter=&currPage=&disableHighlighting=false&displayGroups=&sortBy=&search_within_results=&p=OVIC&action=e&catId=&activityType=&scanId=&documentId=GALE%7CEJ3010910209&source=Bookmark&u=byuidaho&jsid=3a6996dd40858164f4159c2111f04903

Wilson, J., Jenner, E. A. (2001). Infection control in clinical practice (2^nd ed.). London, UK: Harcourt Publishers.

Guarding Virtue

I've dated some.....not so great guys over the past couple years...and it's disappointing and frustrating to me that the large majority of them made it quite obvious they were only interested in me because of what I could offer them physically. And after the first few dates, they wonder soon after, why I'm no longer interested. I'm not saying that every guy is like this, but from my experience, this is how it's been.

I'm then surprised, when others call me a "prude" and tell me I'm "too uptight", like guarding my virtue is a horrible thing. Or they say things like, "no wonder you still aren't married." or "no wonder you've never had any boyfriends" or "you just need to put yourself out there."

I will have you know, that I am not going to disrespect myself by choosing to "let loose" and let a guy be physical with me, especially when I do not feel comfortable. I do not exist for the enjoyment of others.

So, I'm NOT sorry if it's been two days, two weeks, or two months, and I still haven't kissed you. To be rather frank, you don't deserve it. I want to give you the chance to know everything you can about ME, not my body. That sacred experience, I will guard with my life, and reserve until temple marriage.

And I don't care how attractive a women is, she is not there for you to take advantage of. Yes, she is beautiful, but she is a beautiful Daughter of God, and she deserves your utmost respect, and you owe it to her, and yourself, to show some self-control; You are sons of God after all, divinity literally exists inside you.

But how can you expect to potentially become the creators of worlds in the eternities, if you can't even control what you've been given here, right now?

The Lord Is My Light

Happy Monday everyone! So many more experiences await you! Today, I just had to post, and express my love for the Gospel of Jesus Christ in my life.

Heavenly Father lives, I've always known He does, even as I've struggled with my testimony and tried to understand the role the Gospel plays in my own life. He is always aware of us, always! And He wants to help us with everything in our lives if you will only just ask with a humble heart.

This new year has been a crazy new adventure already. I feel like I'm coming back from something that I was very convinced was going to destroy me more than once. And it's something I wouldn't be able to do without my friends, family, and others who have given me the love, support, and tools I've needed to get my world back in order. I can't say it's been a great learning experience as fully as I hope to one day, I'm still reaching my head just above the water, but so far, it has been a testimony builder, and I've already seen the light and the blessings Heavenly Father has bestowed on me.

I've learned that Heavenly Father really has created us to withstand the storms we will face in our lives. He does not leave us without aid, but it takes us sometimes realizing we need that help and asking, pleading even, for His Almighty hand. And it's such a comfort to me to know that our Father does not hold us accountable for the things in our lives that are out of our control. The things that will possibly cloud our minds and our judgement, making us think and even act like someone we aren't. He is fully aware of our circumstances, and He is willing to guide us to the help that we my need in addition to the help of the Atonement. He will always support us as we learn to grow and become stronger individuals in this mortal life.

I was reading in the scriptures just the other day, and I found a passage that really rang true to me, and I wish to share it. It's found in Psalms 55:

"Give ear to my prayer, O God; and hide not thyself from my supplication. Attend unto me, and hear me: I mourn in my complaint. . . My heart is sore pained within me: and the terrors of death are fallen upon me. Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me, and horror hath overwhelmed me. . . 

"I will call upon God; and the Lord shall save me. Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray, and cry aloud: and he shall hear my voice. He hath delivered my soul in peace from the battle that was against me. . .Cast thy burdens upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved."

We can call for help in our darkest hour, and He will come and rescue us. 

I am so grateful for the Gospel in my life, I'm so grateful I was raised and taught the gospel from a young age. I'm so grateful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It covers everything, can save us from anything, comfort us from anything, and heal us of anything. It truly is the greatest gift our Father in Heaven has given us.

I'm so grateful to be here at this amazing university, here the Gospel is so intertwined with the study, and with the atmosphere of learning and growing. I'm grateful for the chance I have to become something great in this life and in the next because of my divine birthright. 

I have to say I'm so grateful for my bishops, stake presidents, and the seminary teachers I've had. I've felt so much love and support from you, and I'm so grateful for the time you've put towards my future success. You've helped so much, and your influence in my life has greatly impacted the reason why I'm still on this Earth. 

I pray that those who need to feel God's love, will feel it, and they will know it's real just as I do. I testify that our Father and Jesus Christ live, they are so close to us. We are never left alone. They know, and we knew, that coming to Earth would be hard. But we also knew it would be so worth it. I'm so grateful I've chosen the Lord's plan, and I can't wait to continue on the path towards eternal happiness. I pray that those who need to feel God's love, will feel it, and they will know it's real just as I do, in the name of our Savior Jesus Christ, amen.

"The Lord is my light; the Lord is my strength.

I know in his might I'll conquer at length.
My weakness in mercy he covers with pow'r,

And, walking by faith, I am blest ev'ry hour."

The Lord Is My Light Hymn 89

Our Gift To Choose

Thanksgiving was last week, and I'm a bit behind, but today I'm so grateful for my agency, and the chances I have to learn.

This past year, I've got to say, it's been tough. I've felt confused, anxious, scared, and so alone at times. I've struggled to let Heavenly Father be a part of my life, and I've realized how impossible it is to try and do it without Him.

I'm so grateful for my agency. I'm so grateful for the amazing gift my Heavenly Father has given me to chose and be responsible for myself. I'm also grateful for the Atonement that was made, because Heavenly Father knows I'm not perfect, and He knows I'm going to make mistakes and bad choices in my life.

Our agency is essential to the Plan of Salvation, because if we did not have the ability to act for ourselves, there wouldn't be any progress in this life. And that's why we are here! Our life is like a big learning adventure, and we don't always see it, but it really is so amazing and is proof of how much Heavenly Father really does love all His children.

I've made bad choices in my life. I made the mistake of choosing not to attend church for one week. And I told myself it was okay, because it was just for one week, and I would go the next. But that one week became two, then three, then a month, and the next thing I knew I hadn't been to church for six months. My scripture study and my prayers were happening less and less, and eventually, I started doubting things I thought I would never doubt. What you choose is so important, even when it doesn't seem like it.

But making one bad decision doesn't mean it's the end. In the October 2010 General Conference, Elder Robert D. Hales gave a talk about agency, and he said:

"Whenever we disobey, we spiritually paint ourselves into a corner and are captive to our choices. Though we are spiritually stuck, there is always a way back. . .  Returning to the Lord isn’t easy, but it is worth it."

We can chose to turn back to God, and He will be there ready to help us. I've heard stories of people saying that God never really leaves us during out trials, and when you do return to Him, you will find that He never left you. I can testify that God doesn't leave us. You think he does, you think He has. You think He's left you all alone to figure everything out for yourself, and He isn't listening to you when you hit rock bottom and realize you need to start calling for help.

But He is ALWAYS there. There were times when I would pray, and I even felt like Heavenly Father was there and He was listening, but He just wouldn't do anything to help me. I would get confused and frustrated, and I wished He would just do something. I wanted everything to just make sense, I wanted Him to show me what I was supposed to do.

But it doesn't work like that. Because if God was to just show us what we needed to do, we wouldn't be learning for ourselves. It wouldn't be a personal journey for each of us, like it needs to be. We would just be puppets, moving when the strings were pulled and we had to follow.

God has already shown us what we need to do. We have the Commandments, the Word of Wisdom, the scriptures, and prophets and apostles that teach us the things we need to do. It's a much more powerful experience when we make the choice ourselves to be obedient to those things, and it puts us on the path to progression we were sent here to take.

When you make a bad decision, the Atonement of Jesus Christ is there to help you overcome your weaknesses and mistakes, because Heavenly Father is amazing, and He knew we would all need it. We don't need to feel hopeless forever, because it's never too late to make the right choice. Humbling yourself and choosing to act in obedience is such a powerful experience, and you can make it right with Heavenly Father when you make it a focus to repent daily, and make better choices more often than bad ones.

"And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask [and act] with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost." Moroni 10:4

I know that God lives, He gave us our agency, and He's expecting us to use it. We have the potential and the strength, because we are His children, and we have His help. It reminds me of my favorite scripture, the one I like to live by:

"For with God nothing shall be impossible." Luke 1:37

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

And I wish everyone an upcoming Merry Christmas! :)


 https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2010/10/agency-essential-to-the-plan-of-life?lang=eng

Why Do You Want To Live The Gospel?

For the past couple of months, I’ve thought a lot about what the gospel of Jesus Christ means to me, and wondered if it is something I can make work in my life. And I’ve got to be honest, I never saw myself as one who would try and find an alternate way when it got hard, or someone who would ever doubt the experiences I had in the past. 

The truth, which was bothersome to me for a short time, but is now something I’m grateful for, is the fact that there isn’t an alternative way. The gospel of Jesus Christ is the only way to find true happiness on this earth, and in the life to come. There are no “easy way” outs, and no shortcuts to eternal happiness. 

Robert L. Simpson once said: “It is only this `living water,' the gospel of Jesus Christ, that can and will bring a happy, a successful, and an everlasting life to the children of men."

So how can we strive for, and partake of the Living Water? The main thing I want to talk about, is the difference between testimony and conversion. The two words have made a lot more sense to me lately, and I’d like to share some thoughts I’ve had.

First, testimony. A testimony is what a person claims to believe to others, it is something everyone needs to have. I always thought when a person had a strong testimony, it meant they were the most spiritual person they could be, and it was more of an end result. I felt like conversion was just what happened after you had a testimony for so long and kept it growing; eventually you would just always know that what you believed was true. 

Elder David A. Bednar has said: “Knowing that the gospel is true is the essence of a testimony. Consistently being true to the gospel is the essence of conversion.”

The two important words of that statement to me, are the words knowing, and being. What I’ve come to understand, is that a testimony is something we let others know. It’s an outward expression of what we know to be true. Conversion is what results inside of us when we act on those truths, it’s something we choose for ourselves based on what we’ve felt and learned, and it’s not going to be something people will see right away.

What I’ve learned is that it is so important to gain a testimony. You always hear it, and how it’s important, but IT REALLY IS SO IMPORTANT. Because your testimony is what your conversion will stand on, as you continue to experience, learn, testify, and do the things the Holy Ghost guides you to do. I’ve realized more now, that before I graduated, I was still building my testimony, even when I felt I was “doing” just fine. But just learning and testifying isn’t ever going to be enough. We need to really ask ourselves: " Why do I want to live the gospel?" and then choose to make the commitment. 

Our loving Heavenly Father has given us everything, literally everything. But one of the most important gifts He has given us, is our decision to choose. There is so much power that comes when we choose to follow Christ and His teachings, because our decision is really the only thing we have to give back that will be our own.

“…anything else we give is something that God already gave to us. When we give tithes or offerings, we are simply giving back to God what He first gave to us. Any money we earn in this life, for example, comes to us because of God’s creations. If we give our time, we are giving what God already gave to us—our days upon the earth. But when we give our will to Him, this is a gift that is uniquely ours to give. When we give our will, we are giving ourselves totally, withholding nothing. If we gain a testimony, and then make the conscious choice to change and live our lives as Heavenly Father has said we should, think of how amazing and powerful that choice really is, and how dramatic the impact will be in your life.” -Russell T. Osguthorpe

I’ve noticed since returning home from school, the change that’s already started as I’ve made the decision to try again. There really is something so special that I feel when I actually wake up, and go to church in the morning. I feel like I’ve got the chance to show Heavenly Father that I’m trying, and I’m so grateful to have the chance.

I’m so grateful for the Atonement that makes it possible for us to try again when we stumble, make mistakes, and have doubts. It’s so amazing, and it’s so special. I know that it is real, and it can and needs to be a part of our lives constantly. It’s a sweet experience when you humble yourself, and allow yourself to be His child, where you can tell him anything in complete honesty, and He works with you to make things right, telling you how much love He has for you along the way. 

It’s a lifelong process, and I’m so grateful that I’m able to have this learning experience. I’ve learned so much already, and I’m looking forward to what the future holds when I never let myself give up. I knew once that it would be worth it, and I need to have faith and jump until I can know that again.

Trials really are amazing, they are a gift, and we should be thankful for them. They are painful, and unbearable at times, but it’s the perfect chance for Him to show us what we are made of when we can’t see it ourselves. They help us grow so much. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.